These days, too many relationships are ending in tears, even relationships you never thought would end in tears. Because we are good people who are invested in your emotional well-being, we decided to create a list of signs to watch out for in your relationship so it doesn’t end in tears.
Thank us later.
1. If you had sex on the first date.
Trust us, it will definitely end in tears. How can you start a relationship with tlof tlof? Omo, better buy your tissues in advance.
2. If you didn’t have sex on the first date.
You didn’t have sex on the first date and you want the relationship to last? Hian oh. You better start rehearsing the tears now.
3. If you both had a talking stage.
This is a sure banker that the relationship will collapse. You people have talked all the relationship talk during talking stage. What else is left to chitchat about in the relationship?
4. There was no talking stage.
Omo, sorry for you oh. If you entered a relationship with someone without getting to know them, what makes you think it will not end in tears?
5. You are hiding it from social media.
If you love them that much, why are you hiding the relationship from social media? You don’t people to see who you are dating abi? LMAO hot tears loading.
6. You are posting it with your full chest.
Ehn? Ehn? Clearly, you are setting your lover up for hot tears. Walahi. Someone will see them on your post and move to them, and they will agree. Next thing, they’ll break up with you. All because you posted them on the Internet. Hot tears oh, hot tears.
7. The sex is good.
Ahan, good things never last. You of all people should know that. As they are serving you orgasm, they will soon serve you heartbreak. Do you want to bet?
8. The sex is just there.
People that are collecting good sex, they are eating the breakfast of heartbreak. What is now your own with the mediocre sex? My deaar, should we cut the tissue for you or you will wipe your tears with your clothes?
9. They are calling you sweet names.
That is how they will sweeten you up to the point of tears. Baby, sugar, honey, I think we should give each other space, sweetie, my love. Pele dear.
10. It’s your government name they call you.
Ah, they are calling you Favour Adaripon, your government name and you still think the relationship has not entered life support? Better start watching Nkiru Sylvanus movies so you can start practicing your tears.
11. You have many things in common.
That means see finish has entered it. They will soon see you finish with the heartbreak. Take it from us.
12. You don’t have many things in common.
Hm. Do we need to say more? Do we really need to emphasize that you are in for an emotional rollercoaster? You better end that relationship now before it is too late.
A word is enough for the wise oh.